Your relationships change as YOU change.
This is something that I have experienced and witnessed around me – particularly through Reiki in the last decade.
When the relationship you have with yourself changes to a more loving one, the relationships around you will reflect that.
This may cause some relationships to break.
Some may heal.
Some may disappear for a while only to reappear again.
Some new ones may form.
There is a constant movement of change and we aren’t always aware of it until it happens and we look back and see it.
This can feel upsetting at times.
But remember, that all relationships are a reflection of YOU.
So if you change how you feel about yourself, good or bad, then it will always be reflected back to you.
You don't own your relationships.
Trevor Noah learnt the valuable lesson quite early on in his life that we own nothing in our lives – especially our relationships!
Fifi was Trevor’s dog when he was a child.
One day, Trevor discovered that Fifi was escaping from their yard in the daytime when everybody was out, and going to play with another boy in a nearby house.
“Fifi was my first heartbreak. No one has ever betrayed me more than Fifi. It was a valuable lesson for me. The hard thing was understanding that Fifi wasn’t cheating on me with another boy. She was merely living her life to the fullest. Until I knew she was going out on her own during the day, her other relationship hasn’t affected me at all.
Fifi had no malicious intent.
I believed that Fifi was MY dog, but of course that wasn’t true.
Fifi was A dog.
I was A boy.
We got along well.
She happened to live in my house.
That experience shaped what I have felt about relationships for the rest of my life:
YOU DO NOT OWN THE THING YOU LOVE.
I was lucky to learn that lesson at such a young age. I have so many friends who still, as adults, wrestle with feelings of betrayal.
They’ll come to me angry and crying and talking about how they’ve been cheated and lied to.
I feel for them.
I understand what they are going through.
I sit with them and buy them a drink and I say: Friend, let me tell you the story of Fifi.”
Trevor learnt the valuable lesson that owning is an illusion.
We own nothing in our lives.
"We merely borrow, nurture, nourish, protect and love the things around us, including our relationships, until its time for us to leave and hand them all over."
In summary there are two simple truths here:
- Your relationships will change as you do and,
- You don’t own anything in life, including your relationships.
Once a person truly understands this and practises it, they are on their way to living freely.
Life starts to feel lighter.
I wish this feeling for each and every one of you.
Please share if you found this post useful. Thank you.
